Attachment Style Quiz — Online Relationship & Attachment Trauma Coach

Discover your attachment style.

Take my free, five minute (or less) attachment style quiz and find out how your childhood programming plays a role in your closest relationships today.

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What is attachment theory?

Attachment theory is a psychological framework developed by John Bowlby, a British psychiatrist and psychoanalyst. It focuses on the nature and impact of the emotional bonds individuals form with others, particularly in the early stages of life. Attachment theory explains that our earliest relationship dynamics (most often between birth and age ten) greatly influence how we experience love as adults.

These earlier experiences with our primary caregivers become the blueprint that we subconsciously follow until we realize that we are repeating a destructive and harmful pattern in our relationship and decide to make the conscious choice to do the work and learn healthier, new ways of relating and attaching to others.

What is attachment trauma?

Attachment trauma is created when a child experiences disruptions or difficulties in the formation of secure emotional bonds with their primary caregiver(s), which can have long-lasting effects on emotional and psychological development. These disruptions can occur due to various factors, such as physical or emotional neglect, abuse (psychological, physical, emotional), separation from caregivers, or inconsistent caregiving from parents with mental health disorders (alcoholism, substance abuse issues, emotional immaturity, narcissism etc..).

Attachment trauma can have significant impacts on a person's sense of self, relationships, and emotional regulation throughout their life. It may manifest in symptoms such as difficulty trusting others, fear of abandonment, emotional dysregulation, and challenges in forming and maintaining healthy relationships.

Attachment Style Breakdown

Attachment styles are categorized into four main concepts:

✸ Secure Attachment

✸ Anxious Attachment

✸ Avoidant Attachment

✸ Disorganized Attachment

Secure Attachment

Individuals with secure attachment styles feel comfortable with emotional closeness and are generally confident in their relationships. They are able to trust and rely on others while also maintaining a healthy sense of independence. Securely attached individuals are generally grounded in who they are, their needs, values, and ways of giving and receiving love. Securely attached individuals tend to have trusting, long-term relationships. They have healthy ways of self-soothing and navigating insecurities.

Anxious Attachment

People with an anxious attachment style often seek intimacy and validation from their partners but may feel insecure and constantly fear rejection or abandonment. They may become preoccupied with their relationships and seek reassurance frequently. Anxiously Attached individuals are highly sensitive and crave deep connections. They often minimize their needs and hide their opinions in fear of disapproval or rejection. They tend to have a self-sacrificing nature, which usually overrides their own needs and desires.

Avoidant Attachment

Individuals with an avoidant attachment style tend to value independence and self-sufficiency more than emotional closeness. They often suppress or downplay their emotions and may appear distant or detached in relationships. For someone avoidantly attached closeness (again physically and/or emotionally) can leave them feeling smothered, overwhelmed, and very uncomfortable.

Disorganized Attachment

(AKA - Fearful/Avoidant)

This attachment style results from a combination of anxious and avoidant tendencies. People with fearful/avoidant attachment styles desire close relationships, but they also fear being hurt or rejected. They often struggle with internal conflicts and may appear unpredictable in their behavior. A person with a Disorganized Attachment Style lives in an ambivalent state of wanting closeness/connection and then wanting distance. They have both anxious and avoidant tendencies.

Ready to work together?

I know how overwhelming it can feel to take a look at the past wounds you suffered growing up in a home that was not nurturing, unsafe, or perhaps highly critical.

The good news is, you don’t have to do this alone. Together we will unpack your upbringing; address your most stubborn self-sabotaging patterns; and create a blueprint for life that will help you finally feel free and attract the partner, career, and goals you’ve always known were possible.

I have made it my mission to help hundreds of people heal from their complex childhood experiences, and completely transform their lives and their relationships by getting to the root cause of their insecure attachment style and feelings of low self-worth.