What Am I Really Hungry For?

As spring and summer are fast approaching, many of us are starting to move out of hibernation and get back outside. And with every new season, our bodies may start to crave lighter foods, lighter clothing; and start to crave fresh air and sunlight. And as exciting as this can be, many people that I work with share the dread they feel about all the comfort foods, holiday parties, and the few extra pounds they may have put on to keep themselves warm and cozy through this cold/dark winter. 

For some, food is used as fuel. A way to energize the body, keep it strong, and enjoy the occasional ‘cheat’ night with friends and family. And for many others, food is used as a coping mechanism; either to try and regulate overwhelming emotions; a way to increase serotonin & dopamine; or as a secret addiction to keep themselves ‘safe’ and comforted through times of stress. 

So why do some people seem to have an effortless relationship with their weight and diet, while others seem to battle it most of their lives? 

Well, it all has to do with that complex, three pound organ sitting on top of your neck (yes, the wildly misunderstood, fascinating brain). 

As a child, my first ‘addiction’ was with food. 

I used to fantasize about it. I would sneak it, binge on it, and dream about getting my next ‘fix’. I would never just want one bagel, it had to be two. I would never just want two eggos, it had to be four (covered in maple syrup of course). And when my good looking, health-obsessed parents realized that their spunky, overly-talkative, sociable daughter was packing on the pounds; the ‘diets’ began. And a cycle was born. 

The tricky thing about addiction is realizing that it rarely has to do with the substance of choice. Yes, will heroin, cocaine, sugar, or cigarettes light up your dopamine receptors, boost serotonin, and send your body into a need/want cycle; of course. But that's only a part of the problem. 

If we want to get to the root of why some people crave substances (food, drugs, booze, etc) more than others, we have to understand how our unique brain (s) work.

It took me until my 30's to realize my brain worked differently than others. I was taught in early recovery that I was just ‘impulsive’ or had ‘addictive tendencies’ and that's why I was so ‘all or nothing’ with things. But like the stubborn, fiery, scorpio that I am; that answer wasn't good enough for me and I needed a better one. One that made actual sense as to why I walk around the world hunting for dopamine. 

If you find yourself ‘addicted’ to sugar, processed flour, booze, dope, or spending; here's what may be going on: 

Certain foods & drugs—especially sugar, carbs, and processed fats—impact the brain's dopamine system much like drugs and alcohol do. They offer a quick hit of pleasure or calm, especially for those with unresolved trauma or dysregulated nervous systems.

Let's take food/sugar addiction for example: 

It spikes dopamine in the brain (that feel-good, reward chemical), giving a little mood boost. But it also quickly raises and drops your blood sugar, which means:

🍭Your energy crashes

🍭Mood plummets

🍭Brain fog creeps in

🍭Anxiety or low-grade depression resurfaces

🍭And then—you crave more sugar to fix it

It becomes a loop that’s easy to fall into, especially when you’re already moving through stress, grief, burnout, or healing.

Here's what is really going on. You may be low on dopamine as a result of depression, ADHD, nervous system disregualtion; or unprocessed trauma. 

🧠 Dopamine: Your Brain’s “Feel Good” Messenger

Dopamine is the neurotransmitter responsible for motivation, reward, pleasure, and habit formation.

Whenever you do something that your brain deems pleasurable—like eating something sweet, scrolling on your phone, or getting a like on Instagram; dopamine is released.

And while this isn't a newsletter demonizing sugar or social media, we may want to address how much we are using it as a way to soothe, control, or avoid. Many people (in and out of recovery) have difficulty self-soothing, expressing vulnerability, or experience feelings of overwhelming sadness, loneliness, or anxiety; and food can feel like the perfect escape to not have to let any of that surface. But remember, too much of any good thing can actually make all those symptoms worse. 

If you're stuck in this cycle, start paying attention to how your brain functions when you feel most optimal. Over the years, I have come to realize that my brain works best on a higher (healthy) fat diet, lower in processed carbs, and filled with lots of fruits and veggies for satiety. And does this mean that I don't eat any sugar, or processed carbs? Absolutely not. But I can tell you one thing, when I do eat them for an extended period of time I feel like absolute dog sh*t. Depression surfaces; my motivation is low; my body and joints hurts; and I start to isolate just like I did when I was using. What is most important is that I remember I am hard-wired to seek pleasure as a result of low dopamine, depressive tendencies, and a compulsion to alter my mood as a result. 

Just for today, make friends with your brain and don't fear it as the enemy. Get clear on when you feel you best, and when you feel your worst, and what substances either help or hinder those two states. 

And please remember one thing: 

Bad habits will always feel good at first, and worse later. 

And good habits will feel bad/difficult at first, but great later. 

And if you want to take a deeper dive into what sugar does to our brain, mood, and nervous system, go have a listen to The Living Out Loud Podcast episode ‘Am I addicted to Sugar?’